The Halo Idiots pt1
by Allenator05
Summary: In the year 2552, mankind is locked in a desperate struggle for survival against the alien factions of the Covenant.  Part of the reason why humanity has not become extinct yet is the SPARTANS.  Genetically modified humans created to be faster, stronger, smarter, the ultimate fighting force.  Unfortunately, Allen-13 and Steve-76 aren't like the others.  They're idiots.
1. Meet the Idiots

Dr. Catherine Halsey sat at her desk going over current reports. A chime sounded and a holographic figure of a slim looking woman appeared.

"I'm sorry to bother you while you are working Doctor," Cortana said.

Dr. Halsey put down the papers she was reading and stared at Cortana. "Well, what is it?"

"It seems there was a...disturbance at an off base pub," Cortana said.

Dr. Halsey sighed. "Since when do I care about a disturbance at an off base pub?" she asked.

Cortana crossed her arms and stared at the doctor. "I think you would care since a couple of your Spartans were somehow involved."

"My Spartans?" Dr. Halsey grew serious and leaned forward in her chair. "Which ones and how many?" she asked. Cortana merely gave her a look and the doctor sighed and leaned back in her chair. "Let me guess. Those two again?" Cortana nodded.

Those two in question were now standing before Chief Petty Officer Mendez in full uniform in the chief's office. They wore various campaign ribbons on their left breast and Second Class Petty Officer insignia on their collars.

Chief Mendez stood behind his desk, looking none too happy. "So explain this to me again?" he asked.

The taller of the two stood up a little straighter and said, "We headed off base for dinner. I had heard others talking about this pub, so we decided to go check it out."

"Were you in uniform?" Chief asked. They both shook their heads. "We were in civilian attire," shorter one said.

Chief Mendez slammed his fists on the desk. "How did you two knuckle heads obtain civilian attire?" he yelled.

The two Spartans glanced at each other, then stared straight ahead. "Never mind that," Chief Mendez said, waving his hand. "What happened next?"

"Well, we went off base to the pub," the shorter one said. "When we got there, the place was only half full or so. We sat down and ordered our food. While we were waiting, a group of guys at the bar were drunk and starting to get loud."

"They were ODST," the tall one said, as if that explained everything. Chief Mendez rolled his eyes. The smaller Spartan continued. "Anyway, they started to get loud and it was bothering everyone else in the pub. About that time, our food arrived. I had the Philly cheese-steak and he had the steak sirloin."

"It was really good," the tall one said. The short one nodded in agreement. "I haven't eaten that good in a long time."

"A lot better than field rations," the tall one said.

"Yeah, but anything is better than field rations, even galley food on the Navy ships," the short one said.

"But I thought you liked the field rations," the tall one said, slightly confused.

"Who cares? Food is food. If you don't like it, then don't eat it and give it to me," the short one argued.

"ENOUGH!" Chief Mendez shouted and the two Spartans clammed up. "I don't care what you think about food! What happened in the pub?"

"Well, we were eating our food, minding our own business, when one of the ODST's started complaining, rather loudly, how the Spartans get all the glory and recognition for jobs the ODST could handle just as well," the tall one said. "I turned around and asked, very nicely, if he could keep his voice down and how he was bothering everyone else."

"So he gets up from the bar with his buddies and walks over to our table," the short one adds. "I forget exactly what happened then, but the next thing I knew, bodies were flying through the air and stuff was breaking."

"He said that 'little punk civilians' should stay out of the military's business," the tall one said. "I told him he was drunk and not to start a fight he couldn't win. Evidently, one of his buddies didn't like that comment very much and he suggested we go out side and settle this matter. I told him straight out only one of us was going outside and it wasn't going to be me."

"Yeah, he didn't like that very much," the other Spartan added. "Anyway, they started it and we ended it as quickly as possible to prevent unnecessary property damage."

Chief Mendez sighed and shook his head. "Of all the Spartans, why are you two the only ones that seem to get into trouble."

"But they started it and we were defending ourselves," the tall Spartan said. Chief Mendez silenced him with a stern look. "If you two characters were anyone else, you'd be kicked out of the military and shipped back to the sorry stinkhole you came from, but we can't exactly do that, can we?"

"But I didn't do anything!" the short Spartan complained.

"Guilt by association stupid," the other Spartan whispered.

"So this is your 'punishment'," Chief Mendez roared. "You two are going on special assignment. Gather whatever gear you think you want and be ready to depart at 0800 tomorrow. Now get out of here!" With a chorus of "Aye Chief," the two Spartans snapped to attention, performed an about-face, and exited the office. After they were gone, Chief Mendez collapsed in his chair. "Those two are going to give me ALL of my gray hair," he sighed.

"Spartans Steve-076 and Allen-013," Dr. Halsey looked through the files on her computer.

"It would seem those two are always in some sort of trouble," Cortana said. Lines of data scrolled across her holographic body as she also read through their files. "Have you considered splitting them up?"

Dr. Halsey shook her head. "They work best together."

"Why did you even consider them for the Spartan project?" Cortana asked. Dr. Halsey shrugged. "They had all the genetic markers I was looking for."

"A borderline psychopath and a hot tempered introvert?" Cortana asked skeptically. Dr. Halsey gave her a dirty look. "And they don't exactly conform to the military standards and regulations," Cortana added.

"Oh I give up," Dr. Halsey threw her hands up in defeat. "You know how important the Spartan Project is. I needed all the subjects I could find. I couldn't afford to be choosy. Besides," Dr. Halsey leaned forward and stared at Cortana. "If they are as bad as you say, how have they made it this far as Spartans?" Cortana shrugged. "I could go into any number of hypothesis about the chances of these two surviving while other...more desirable...candidates did not, but you probably don't want to hear them."

"I don't," Dr. Halsey said. "It doesn't matter if they are less than desirable. As long as they are Spartans, they can get the job done."

Cortana crossed her arms and paused for a few moments as she reviewed more of their files. "It would seem that a certain someone does not have a monopoly on the supply of what you would call, 'luck'."

"It helps to have as many different tools as possible," Dr. Halsey said. "John is certainly what you would consider a poster boy for the Spartans, but that doesn't mean the others haven't done their part, or made sacrifices."


	2. Idiots, Assemble

"What do you suppose the special assignment is?" Allen asked. He and Steve were in the armory gathering equipment.

"I don't know. That's probably why it's special," Steve replied.

Allen frowned and held up a magnum pistol, checking it over. "You ever notice how we seem to be the only ones who get all the 'special assignments'? And they aren't even that special."

Steve racked the bolt on a battle rifle and dry fired the trigger. "So what are you saying?"

"I'm saying that we're the odd balls out of all the Spartans," Allen said. He sighed and sat on a bench. "You ever notice how the others are all, 'Yes sir, No sir, Not today sir, my sense of humor was removed in training sir, they traded my spine for a stick up the behind sir."

"What's wrong with being gung-ho military?" Steve asked.

"Nothing is wrong with it, but I don't think it's all that gung-ho stuff," Allen said. He shook his head and added, "I don't know what it is."

"I think it's because we don't conform to the strict, by-the-book military way of thinking," Steve said. "Yeah, we have all the special training and what not, but I think it's because we still retain some form of creative thinking."

Allen shrugged. "I guess that's okay." He picked up a pair of SMGs and stripped them down for cleaning. "You know, sometimes I wonder why I was picked to be a Spartan," he said.

"Yeah, I wonder what Dr. Halsey was thinking when she picked you too," Steve said laughing. Allen gave him a dirty look and threw a dirty cleaning rag at him. "I'm being serious here."

"You? Serious? Ha! That'll be the day," Steve said, earning another object thrown his direction, this time a pinned grenade. "Hey, be careful with that!" Steve warned. Allen shrugged. "So what? The pin's still in."

Steve put the grenade back in the crate it came from and stood in front of the weapon racks. "I don't know what to bring," he pouted.

"So take one of everything," Allen suggested. He finished cleaning the SMGs, reassembled them and set them aside with the pistol.

Steve thought about Allen's comment and nodded his head. "That's actually not a bad idea. You never know what might come up."

Allen retrieved a combat knife and began to sharpen it. "We probably won't even need all of it," he said.

Steve eventually decided on one of everything except the rocket launcher. "Might as well take it," Allen said.

"Then you take it," Steve shot back. Allen shrugged and said, "Maybe I will. I'm better with it anyway."

Steve and Allen set aside the weapons they were taking along with extra ammo and a crate of grenades.

The next morning, Steve and Allen reported to the lab to get outfitted with their armor. As the technicians were helping them put it on, Dr. Halsey appeared. Allen noticed her approach and said, "Good morning Doctor."

Dr. Halsey nodded a curt acknowledgment and said, rather crossly, "I see you two have been busy."

"You mean that thing at the pub?" Steve asked. "We already told Chief Mendez we were sorry."

"Yeah. He made us stay after class and write 'I will not beat up ODSTs a million times each on the black board," Allen chimed in. Dr. Halsey shot him a dirty look and said, "I could lecture you, but I know you wouldn't listen." Steve nodded enthusiastically. Dr. Halsey continued, "However, I will say try not to let anything like this happen again. We can't afford to have the Spartan program come under a bad light. All of my opponents would use this as an example of billions of dollars wasted on super soldiers who operate under different rules."

Steve yawned. "This is starting to sound like a lecture, and we do operate under different rules," he said.

Dr. Halsey shook her head. "There's just no getting through to you, is there? she said sadly.

"Don't worry Doctor. I'll do my best to keep him in line," Allen promised.

"That's what I'm afraid of," Dr. Halsey said under her breath. She shook her head and stood up straight. "When two are finished here, come see me. I'll brief you on your mission."

"Yes Ma'am," Allen replied. Steve merely nodded his head. Dr. Halsey shook her head and left. The technicians finished assembling their armor and Allen stood up. He put on his helmet and the Heads Up Display flickered to life, performing a quick suit diagnostic and health check. He stood almost 2 meters tall and weighed close to half a ton in his armor, colored blue with silver highlights. On his right shoulder was a brown number 5, outlined in gold.

Steve stood up and stretched, his own red and black armor gleaming in the lights with a black devil skull and crossed combat knives painted on the shoulder. Even in armor, he still stood several inches taller than Allen. Steve sighed and put on his helmet. "All right, let's go see what the doc has for us," he said. Allen followed him out.

The door to Dr. Halsey's lab opened and she turned around in her chair to face the two Spartans. She tapped a few keys on her keyboard and a holographic image of the galaxy appeared. Dr. Halsey pressed a few more keys and the map zoomed in on a small corner of the galaxy, displaying several planets.

"I take it this is Reach?" Allen asked, pointing at the map. Dr. Halsey nodded. "We are here on Reach. You will board a military transport and head to this planet here," she said. The map of stars changed position and centered on a small planet several light-years from Reach.

Steve narrowed his eyes and said, "That's in the Outer Territories. Why are we going there?"

"On this planet, known as Omega 4, is a Slipspace monitoring post. It is the farthest in a string of stations that monitor the space lanes between the Inner and Outer Colonies," Dr. Halsey explained.

Allen thought for a moment, then peered closer at the star map. He pointed at the planet and said, "This one is in line with Reach."

"That is correct," Dr. Halsey said. "The last transmission was two days ago. I'm sending you two as an escort for team that is going to investigate why this station went off line. Your mission is to escort the scientists and get the station running again. We can't afford to lose even a single monitoring station."

"You think it was the Covenant?" Allen asked. Dr. Halsey sighed and said, "The higher ups in the military won't consider it, but I believe it is a distinct possibility."

"You're probably right," Steve added. "I'd like to think the place just broke down. It's gotta be, what, twenty or thirty years old? And this planet is a frozen rock by looking at it."

Allen rolled his eyes. "Great. Another hot vacation spot we get to visit."

Steve shrugged and said, "Hey, join the military and see the world, right?"

"Too bad I've never seen a world I'd actually want to visit," Allen grumped. He crossed his arms and made a sour face.

Dr. Halsey cleared her throat. "If you two don't have any questions, I have one more thing." Allen and Steve grew quiet to listen. "I had your armor upgraded to better withstand the cold environment you'll encounter." She turned back to her desk and picked up a data chip. "I'm also giving you this," she said and handed it to Allen. "It's an AI to help with the station repairs and anything else you might encounter on your mission."

Steve looked over Allen's shoulder. "What kind of AI is it?" he asked.

"To put it in terms you might understand, this AI is like Cortana, but not as smart. It also has a different personality," Dr. Halsey said. "Make no mistake, it's still better than any other AI program."

Allen reached into a pocket and pulled out a data reader. He inserted the data chip and turned on the display. A small holographic figure of a woman wearing Ancient Egyptian clothing and wig appeared. "Hello. My name is Isis. I am pleased to make your acquaintance," she said.

Steve leaned over Allen's shoulder. "I know you're just a bunch of colored pixels and data, but you're kinda cute."

Isis peered at Steve and said, "Well, would you prefer I look like this?" Isis changed forms to a wrinkly old woman with long stringy hair and long curved nose.

Steve recoiled in horror and Allen raised an eyebrow. "There's something you don't see every day," he added.

"It's like the ugly stepmother in those fairy tales," Steve added. Isis changed forms back to her original depiction. "I'm glad we understand each other," she said. Allen powered off the data reader and Isis disappeared.

Dr. Halsey dismissed them and the two Spartans left. As the door closed behind them, Cortana appeared, wearing a confused expression. "Did I hear correctly? You gave them Isis?" she asked. Dr. Halsey nodded her head. "But isn't that AI-" Cortana started, but Dr. Halsey cut her off. "Think of it as part of their punishment," she said. Cortana gave the doctor a confused look. "What? I'm not allowed to have a little bit of fun every now and then?" Dr. Halsey asked.

"I just assumed such petty games were below you," Cortana replied, crossing her arms.


	3. Idiots, Doctor Doctor, Idiots

Allen and Steve arrived in the hangar and began loading their gear on the shuttle. As Steve brought the last case on board, Allen looked behind them and saw a small crowd of a dozen people approach. "Is it just me, or is that the people we're going to babysit?" Steve turned around and looked where Allen indicated. After several seconds, he said, "It's just you." Allen rolled his eyes and shook his head as he walked down the ramp to meet the party.

Before he could say a word, a scientist with graying hair and thick glasses spoke up. "Before we get started, let me just say, your presence is not needed nor required for this mission."

Startled and taken completely off guard, all Allen managed to say was, "Excuse me?"

"As I said, you are not needed," the scientist said. He looked Allen over and said, "Shouldn't you be off somewhere suppressing Insurrectionists or some other menial task?"

"No, that's what ODST's are for," Allen shot back with a bit more venom than he intended.

"Ah, so the soldier does indeed possess a brain," the scientist retorted. Inwardly, Allen was seething. They hadn't even left Reach and he wanted to strangle the scientist himself.

"Temper, temper," Steve chided over the helmet mike. Allen opened a private channel and said, "Why don't you come out here and say hello?"

"But you're getting along so well," Steve said. "Oh, and I think your new friend is getting agitated."

Allen glanced down and saw the scientist with his hands on his hips and tapping his foot impatiently. "Would you kindly move yourself out of the way? We need to embark and stow our equipment."

Allen stepped aside and waved them on. "As you wish." The rest of the group walked past and Allen shook his head. He walked around the shuttle, conducting pre-flight checks. As he neared the ramp, he could hear arguing coming from within. Allen poked his head inside and saw the gray haired scientist arguing loudly and gesturing around. Steve simply stood there and Allen knew he wasn't paying any attention. Allen opened a private comm and asked, "What's going on?"

"Well, at first he was complaining about the facilities, or lack thereof. Then he became quite upset about the lack of stowage for his equipment," Steve said, very bored. Allen took a quick glance around outside the shuttle and said, "But they didn't come with anything."

"And now he's quite outraged with the military and how they're interfering with his important work and he's going to talk to somebody important somewhere and see that we're assigned to scrubbing barracks with toothbrushes," Steve added with mock seriousness.

"I ain't using my toothbrush," Allen said.

"Me either. I'm sure we could get some from the ODST's," Steve agreed. Allen boarded the shuttle and closed the door behind him. "Ladies and gentlemen, may I have your attention please?" he said. Everyone, including the gray haired scientist turned to pay attention. "I am Spartan-013 and this is my counterpart Spartan-076," Allen said.

"Counterpart?" Steve asked over the private comm. Allen ignored him. "We will be escorting you to the planet of Omega 4 for repairs to the Slipspace monitoring station. Please sit back and enjoy the flight as we will be taking off shortly." As he turned and headed to the flight cabin, the gray haired scientist spoke up. "Excuse me, but we can't leave yet," he said.

"Why not?" Allen said. "We're already behind schedule. Any further delays will increase the time the station is down. We really need to be going."

"We can't leave without our equipment, and we're missing the pilots," the scientist insisted.

"Pilots? Why would we need pilots?" Steve spoke up. The scientist turned to face him. "Is that a serious question?" he asked.

"Do you want a serious answer?" Steve asked. The scientists jaw dropped in surprise. "Who are you to speak to me in that manner?" he said.

Steve leaned over him and asked, "Who am I? Just who are you anyway? If you're so important, why haven't I heard of you, Doctor-" Steve glanced at the name on his shirt. "Chudkoffski?"

The scientist's face turned purple with rage. "My name is Chudnoffski."

"Chikoffsky?" Steve repeated.

"Chud-noff-ski," the scientist deliberately pronounced each syllable.

"Okay, Doctor Chop Suey," Steve said, standing up. "Does anyone have a pronounceable name, like Smith, or Adams, or Jones, or something like that?"

Another scientist stood up and said, "I'm Dr. Torrez." Steve turned back to Dr. Chudnoffski and said, "See? Why can't you have a name like that. Torrez. Now that's easy to remember and pronounce."

Dr. Chudnoffski was so angry he couldn't speak.

"And as far as pilots go, who needs them?" Steve added. "These things practically fly themselves. You pull back on the stick thing and the plane goes up. Push forward on the stick and the plane goes down. Push one way, the plane goes right and push the other way, the plane goes to the left. The other stick thingie makes the plane go faster." He looked around at the other scientists and technicians and saw their dazed looks. "Don't worry," Steve assured them. "All the pretty lights and buttons don't really do anything anyway. You only need about eight or ten of them anyway, and the rest are just distractions." The crew looked around at each other, not bothering to hide their nervous glances.

Just then, a knock came from the hatch. Allen opened the door and a technician stepped on board and asked, "Is there a Doctor Chudlopsky on board?"

Steve pointed to the doctor and said, "He's right here. And his name's Chopsopki."

The technician handed a small aluminum briefcase to the doctor and left. Allen shut the hatch behind him. "Is that your special eqipment?" he asked Dr. Chudnoffski, who nodded. "Then take your seat sir. It's time to leave," Allen said, and turned to flight cabin. He was joined shortly after by Steve.

"Was all that really necessary?" he asked as Steve buckled himself in. "That guy's a pompous jackass. He had it coming," Steve replied and removed his helmet.

"But you do have a point," Allen said. "If he's as important as he thinks he is, why haven't we heard of him?"

"Well, how many people have heard of Doctor Halsey?" Steve asked. Allen shrugged. While Steve conducted pre-flight checks, Allen pulled the data reader out of his pocket and turned it on. Isis shimmered to life and looked around. "Why haven't we left yet?" she asked.

"We were delayed," Allen said.

"Some guy named Chudlopsky was making a fuss and delayed our departure," Steve said.

"His name is Chudnoffski, and if you don't mind, I'd like you to do a check on him and see what comes up," Allen asked.

"Wow! You can pronounce that dude's name!" Steve said as they took off. Allen ignored him and asked Isis, "Can you do it?"

Isis crossed her arms and said, "Why would I do that?" Allen was taken aback. "Why not?"

"We're departing soon and I won't be able to access any data networks while in Slipspace." She leaned forward put her hand to her mouth as if to whisper. "However, I managed to hack the military database and gathered all the information I could about where we're going and personnel files on the techies you're baby-sitting before I left Dr. Halsey's office."

Allen grinned and said, "That's what I'm talking about." He unplugged Isis from his data reader and inserted her into the shuttle's system. She reappeared on a holopad on the console between Steve and Allen. She stretched and sighed. "Ah, much better. Your data reader was cramped with all the stuff you have on there." She paused for a minute as lines of data raced across her figure. "Accessing the shuttle's external comm system. And now I'm done."

Steve piloted the shuttle out of the atmosphere and into Space above reach. Allen stared out the window and couldn't help but marvel at spectacle before him. Large battle cruisers and other ships were moored in the space docks and others headed out to places unknown. Space defense platforms and Magnetic Accelerator Cannons bristled with might.

"You know, seeing all this makes me wonder where we get the resources for all this," Allen said.

"Yeah, It's quite the sight," Steve agreed. He piloted the shuttle out and away from all the activity above Reach and pointed them at their exit vector.

"I'll take over from here now," Isis said. Steve took his hands off the controls and said, "Be my guest."

Isis turned to look out the forward window. "Entering Slipspace coordinates. Finalizing the navigation protocol. Double checking the math to make sure I did it right, now triple checking just for fun. All systems normal, ship is ready for Slipspace travel."

Allen thumbed the internal comm and said, "Ladies and gentlemen, we will now be entering Slipspace. You may experience some discomfort as the Slipspace drive engages, this is normal. Estimated arrival time is four hours."

Steve pressed the buttons and the ship departed.


	4. Idiots have feelings too

Cortana appeared on Dr. Halsey's desk. "They've just departed." Dr. Halsey frowned and looked at the clock. "A bit late aren't they?" she said.

"It seems they were delayed. One of the passengers was a bit disagreeable," Cortana explained. "Oh, and I noticed an unauthorized breach in the military database prior to their departure."

"I see," Dr. Halsey said, unsurprised. "What did they get?"

"Nothing, just data on Omega 4 and their passengers," Cortana said. She then asked, "Just who is this Chudnoffsky anyway?"

A devilish grin from Dr. Halsey was all the answer Cortana needed.

After the ship had entered Slipspace, Allen sat back and removed his helmet. He stared out the window and watched the distorted space fly past. All the refracted light and visible energy blended together in a kaleidoscope of light. It was actually quite soothing to watch.

"When you look into the Abyss, the Abyss looks back into you," Isis quoted.

"Who said that?" Steve asked.

"Probably somebody famous who lived a long time ago," Allen said. He continued to look out the window and after a moment, he asked, "You ever wonder what will happen when this is all over?"

"What do you mean?" Steve asked. He pulled out a portable media player and inserted the headphones into his ears.

"I mean, what happens when we get old and can't fight any more? Will the military simply let us retire?" Allen asked.

"You are thinking way too much into this," Steve said. He leaned back and closed his eyes. Isis watched the two carefully. "How is it that you two became Spartans?" she asked. "I don't have much information on the Spartan II program."

"Dr. Halsey abducted us when we were kids," Steve said without opening his eyes. "She told us that we were special kids who would grow up to protect the galaxy."

"They put us through training that makes Hell look like a walk in the park," Allen spoke up. "Then we were poked and prodded and stuck full of needles and underwent all sorts of crazy, experimental surgeries to turn us into supermen. Needless to say, not all of us turned out okay. More than half suffered debilitating paralysis and some were placed into a permanent coma to prevent suffering from the pain."

"Those of us who survived became Spartans," Steve finished. He opened his eyes and stared off.

"I see. Thank you for sharing your experiences with me," Isis said and grew quiet. She folded her hands and looked down, as if doing some thinking. "Do you hate Dr. Halsey for what she did to you?" she finally asked.

After some thought Allen said, "No, I don't hate her. Actually, I don't blame her for what happened. She merely did what she thought was right."

"I imagine she bears tremendous guilt for what she put us through," Steve said. "She comes off as a bit cold and treats us as such, but I think she secretly cares about all of us. Perhaps she even views us as her children in a way."

"I hope history doesn't judge her too harshly," Allen said. "She'll either be viewed as a savior of mankind, or a monster that created more bloodshed. Kind of an 'End Justifies the Means' kinda thing I guess " He turned to Isis and asked, "What about you? What's your story?"

Isis' skin flashed from cool blue, to bright red, back to blue, indicating embarrassment. "I was initially created to oversee flight traffic in and out of Harvest, a simple A.I." Allen and Steve suddenly sat up and leaned close. "You were there?" Steve asked. Isis nodded. "I was on the planet when the Covenant arrived. After annihilating the planetary defenses, they began to glass the planet. My core programming was downloaded from the air traffic control center and taken aboard an outbound flight. Since I was in charge of the flights, I knew the flight paths and planets of origin. They thought if I fell into the hands of the Covenant, the aliens would be able to trace the space lanes from Harvest to the other inhabited planets." As Isis recalled the story, she started to become agitated. "The transport I was on reached space, but was hit with heavy plasma fire and badly damaged. We had no engines and life support had failed. The central network core was damaged and my programing became fragmented."

"Let me guess what happened next, " Allen said. "By the time Admiral Cole had arrived with his battle group, you had repaired enough of your self to send out a distress signal, but not until after the Battle for Harvest was over." Isis nodded her head. "My signal was detected by another AI and I was retrieved. Since I was badly damaged, they initially wanted to erase my memory and decommission me, but Doctor Halsey convinced them I could be repaired. It took some time, but I was upgraded beyond my original programing, However, Dr. Halsey was forced to re-write my missing code, and as a result, I am neither a 'dumb' AI or a 'smart' AI, but something in between."

"Program or not, witnessing something like Harvest had to leave some deep emotional scars," Steve said. Isis looked up at him with a pained expression. "Do you know what it is like to have everything you've worked for, everything you've ever accomplished, everything you've ever cared about, destroyed like it was nothing?" She turned to Allen and asked, "Do you know what it's like to witness Armageddon, and be powerless to prevent it?"

Allen leaned over until he was eye level with the AI. "I have watched people I considered friends die before my eyes, and I wonder even now, why did I live and not them. What makes me so different?"

"This line of work is definitely not good for your longevity," Steve said. "As far as dying goes, all I can do is my best not to . If and when that ever happens, I just hope I did well enough by somebody to see our fallen friends in the afterlife."

After a moment of silence, Isis spoke up. "It seems we all have something that weighs heavy on our hearts," she said. Isis shook her head and wiped her hands on her face. "Enough of the heavy thinking. How about we spy on our charges?"

"As much fun as that sounds, I think we should hear a little bit about where we're going," Steve said. Isis nodded her head. Her figure disappeared and was replaced with a holographic image of Omega 4.

"Obviously, this is Omega 4," Isis said. "It contains little in the way of natural resources. There is breathable atmosphere, but the air is very thin. Survey data from an expedition 40 years ago suggests the entire planet is covered in water with a top layer of ice several miles thick."

Allen peered closer at the planet and sighed. "Just as I thought, a frozen ball of nothing."

"Omega 4's location makes it a prime location for a monitoring outpost," Isis said. "It is located between the Inner and Outer Colonies, and is in direct line with Reach."

"What are the odds the Covenant has a presence there?" Steve asked. Isis shook her head. "I am not sure. Given what's happened in the Outer Colonies, the Covenant is stumbling across inhabited planets by chance."

"Hence the Cole Protocol," Allen said and Isis nodded her head. "Although it appears a bit extreme, any chance we have in delaying the Covenant reaching the Inner Colonies and Earth is a chance we have to take."

Steve leaned back and thought for a moment. "Something tells me that Doctor Chopstick is not an ordinary techie."

Isis nodded her head. "His file shows his background is Xeno-biology. He's a leading expert in his field and has published several books on the subject and currently working under government contract. Exactly what he's been working on is classified at the highest level."

"Well, it's not too hard to figure out that one," Allen said. "Since he's a so-called expert on aliens, the military brought him in to research the Covenant."

The light clicked in Steve's eyes and he snapped his fingers. "Since there's the possibility the Covenant are responsible, he's here to collect data or whatever."

"He probably thinks we're going to screw it up for him by shooting first and not bothering to ask questions later," Allen said.

Steve shrugged and said, "If he wants to be all buddy-buddy with aliens that are bent on the extinction of the human race, that's fine with me."

"Should we ask him about it?" Allen asked.

"Why?" Steve asked.

"Because he could interfere with our primary mission, which is to get the outpost back on line," Allen said.

"Who cares? Let him do his own thing. I'll leave his sorry ass behind if I have too," Steve said.


	5. What the Idiots Found

A chime sounded in the cockpit. "Exit from Slipspace in thirty seconds," Isis announced. Allen and Steve sat up and put on their helmets. Steve keyed the internal comm and said, "Ladies and gentlemen, this is your captain speaking. We are now on approach to our destination Omega 4. First we have to exit Slipspace. If we did everything correctly, everything will go smoothly. If not, well, this might be the last thing you ever hear. I suggest making peace with your god, just in case. If you don't believe in God, rest easy in the fact that you will return to the nothingness that you believe you came from. That is all." With that, Steve clicked the switch off.

Allen gave him a look and said, "That was quite inspiring." Isis put her hands on her hips and frowned. "'If' we did everything right? There was no 'we' about it! I did all the work! O ye of little faith! I used to manage arrival and departure vectors of ships one hundred times the size of this tin can! Why you-" Steve turned off the holo display, cutting Isis off in mid rant. "What is she, my wife?" Steve grumbled. Allen chuckled to himself.

The shuttle exited Slipspace with no abnormalities. Steve switched to the main engines and began a careful descent to the planet. Allen brought up the shuttle's sensor suite on his console and began checking the planet and surrounding space. "So far so good," Allen announced.

"I'm going to circle the planet, just to be safe," Steve said. He turned on the holo display and Isis appeared, looking furious. "Are you gonna behave now?" Steve asked her.

"You have no idea who you're messing with," Isis said angrily.

"Children, please settle down," Allen cautioned. Isis shot him a dirty look and lines of data began scrolling across her translucent body. "I'm detecting no trace of civilization or any form of technology," she said. "The surrounding space is clear. We're the only one's here."

"That's what bother's me," Allen said. Steve nodded in agreement. "Don't outposts like this usually have someone to take care of the systems?" he asked. Isis shook her head. "This outpost is completely autonomous."

Allen looked out the window at the planet below. The light from the far away sun reflected brilliantly off the frozen surface. The dark side showed a light shade of blue. "I wouldn't want to be stationed here, that's for sure," he said.

Isis' image was replaced by a magnified view of a section of the planet. "I've located the outpost. Just follow the markers on the Head's Up Display," she said. Steve wheeled the shuttle over and descended to the planet's surface.

When they had touched down, Allen stood up. "Isis, stay here and continue to perform a full sensor search of the planet while Steve and I investigate the station."

"As if I would do anything else," Isis replied. Before exiting the cabin, Allen turned back and said, "Oh, and lock the door after we leave. We wouldn't want our people to get overzealous, would we?" Isis smiled and nodded.

As Steve walked to the back of the shuttle to collect their gear, Allen addressed the passengers. "Thank you for being patient. Before we let you off to get to work, we need to verify the place is clear."

"Excuse me," Dr. Chudnoffsky stood up. "Is all this really necessary? There is nothing here for you to worry about."

Allen grew silent as he debated whether or not to call out the doctor in front of everyone else. "We're just following standard procedure," he finally said. Dr. Chudnoffsky sat down reluctantly, not satisfied with Allen's answer. Steve returned carrying a case over his shoulder. He set it on the floor and unlocked the case. He pulled out a battle rifle, magnum pistol, extra ammunition, and a bandoleer of grenades. Allen picked up a pair of SMGs, a pistol, and ammunition for both. When they were ready, Steve shut and locked the case and Allen lowered the ramp. A frigid wind howled through the shuttle, causing the passengers to quickly bundle up. "Now children, behave while we're gone," Steve said. "There's snacks in the cupboard if you get hungry. If strangers come, don't answer the door." He stepped onto the surface of Omega 4 and the ramp closed behind him.

"Be safe," Isis offered over their helmet mikes.

"Yes Mother," Steve replied.

Allen looked around through the howling snow. He glanced down at himself and then over at Steve. "Our armor certainly sticks out," he said.

"The better to find you if you get lost," Steve said.

"Or shot by Covenant snipers," Allen groused. They fanned out, constantly searching for anything out of the ordinary.

Back on the shuttle, Isis kept her attention on the shuttle's sensors. "I'm showing no activity," she called over the radio. She received two clicks in response. Convinced there was nothing to be concerned with, Isis then focused the other passengers. As she expected, Dr. Chudnoffsky was becoming impatient. She watched over the shuttle's internal cameras as he tried to open the hatch, only to find it locked. He grumbled to himself and she smiled smugly. The other passengers had started to ignore him and concentrate on their own tasks. It was then she decided to look into the files she'd stolen on the other people. As she read through them, she became alarmed. She quickly referred back to the survey report on Omega 4. As she looked closer, she realized there were parts of the report that were heavily edited by military censors. Isis then performed another scan of the surrounding space, only to find nothing. On second thought, she pointed the transmitters to the ground and adjusted the frequency output as low as she could, creating a crude ground penetrating radar. She fired off several signals and waited for the return. What she saw shocked her. The layer of ice that covered the planet was full of tunnels that were not naturally occurring phenomena.

Since low frequency wavelengths are easily detectable at considerable distances, Isis kept her impromptu survey to a minimum. When she had compiled enough data, she retuned the sensors to normal to check for any sign she'd been detected. While this was in progress, Isis crunched the data from her survey, then sent a coded message to the two Spartans. She received only static in reply.

"Well, at least this will make the doctor happy," Isis grumbled and continued to reach Allen and Steve.

Outside, Allen and Steve traversed the short distance to the station outpost. They took cover on either side of the door. Allen tried the handle and found it unlocked. Steve raised the rifle to his shoulder and nodded. Allen threw open the door and Steve burst inside, scanning for targets. Allen followed close behind, an SMG in either hand. When they determined the immediate coast was clear, Allen shut the door and they carefully ventured into the station. Inside the station, the air was bitterly cold and frost had started to form on the walls. When they reached a junction, Steve called up a map of the station on his HUD and turned left. Allen followed a short distance behind, checking behind them.

Suddenly, Steve stopped and crouched down. Allen remained standing, keeping a sharp lookout. Steve reached out and drew his fingers through a dark stain. He rubbed his fingers together and they turned a dark shade of red.

"There's a bloodstain here," he said. "From the looks of it, it's human." Allen looked carefully looked around and asked, "Any sign of the Covenant?" Steve shook his head and rose to his feet. They continued on, more alert than ever.

Despite the sudden increased danger, Allen's breathing remained steady, his pulse even. He pushed away the thoughts his overactive imagination was conjuring and focused on being a soldier. On the other hand, Steve was starting to get a little excited at the thought of seeing a bit of action. It had been far too long since the both of them had been put to the test. The further in they went, they saw increased signs of struggle in the form of plasma damage, bloodstains and few bullet holes.

They reached the room where the central computer was located and found the door slightly open. Steve pushed open the door, and Allen ducked inside and scanned the room. He lowered his weapons and motioned for Steve to enter.

"Wow. Now that's impressive," Steve marveled. Inside the room was absolute carnage. Blood stained the walls and several frozen corpses were frozen in perpetual anguish. Most had generous portions of their bodies burned away. A further inspection confirmed Allen's fears. "Plasma burns," he said.

Steve shouldered his rifle and looked around the room. "We didn't see any sign of struggle outside," he said. Allen looked at the uniforms on the bodies and saw they were United Nations Space Command. "They must have come out here when the station first went down," he said.

"The Covenant must have surprised them. With no weapons, they probably retreated here to hold out as long as possible," Steve added. He looked at the bodies and shook his head. "Looks like they didn't hold out for very long."

Allen began checking the bodies while Steve looked at the overall condition of the computer. After a little digging, Allen found a partially melted data chip in the pocket of one of the bodies. Steve removed an access panel and rummaged inside.

"I found a data chip," Allen said, holding it up for Steve to see. "It doesn't look like it's usable at all."

Steve pulled several wires out of the access panel. "Well, at least the computer core is in good shape," he said. He looked around the outer casing and nodded in approval. "Looks like the aliens tried to smash it up, but failed. UNSC engineering at its finest."

Allen stood up and took one last survey around the room. "There's a little bit more of this facility to explore, but I think it's safe for the techies to start their work." Steve nodded in agreement and they left the way they came.


	6. Idiots Defend Their Own

After the relative darkness of the outpost interior, the sun blinded them as they stepped out side. After the initial shock, their helmets automatically adjusted to the brightness and they could see again. A tone sounded inside Allen's helmet, indicating a message. It was from Isis.

"Isis, this is Allen. Go ahead," he called.

Isis breathed a sigh of relief. "I finally got a hold of you. Return to the shuttle immediately. I have important information for you," she said.

"We're on our way back right now," Steve said. They reached the shuttle and Isis unlocked the hatch and lowered the ramp. No sooner had the ramp touched the ground, Dr. Chudnoffsky appeared in the entry and attempted to exit. Steve blocked the doctor in and herded him aside as Allen shut the door behind them.

"I say, what's this all about?" Dr. Chudnoffsky sputtered.

"Whoa! Chill out Doc, there's no hurry," Steve said. He put his hands on the doctor's shoulders and the doctor collapsed into a seat from the weight. "Just sit tight for moment, will you?"

Steve and Allen entered the cockpit and closed the door behind them. Isis appeared on the holo display, looking worried.

"What happened?" Allen asked.

"Doctor Halsey set you up," Isis blurted. Stunned, the two Spartans said nothing. Isis continued. "Everyone you brought here works for Dr. Chudnoffsky," Isis explained. "I hope the station is okay because there's no way you two can conduct extensive repairs."

"Then the doctor will be sorely disappointed," Allen said and he told Isis what they found. "So all we need to do is restore power and run a diagnostic to verify the station still works."

"See? Easy day," Steve said. Isis frowned and said, "I wouldn't be too sure of that. While you were gone, I reread the survey report for this planet, and found much of it blacked out. I also performed a very crude ground penetrating radar scan and this is what I found." Isis was replaced by a 3D map of the surrounding surface of Omega 4. Just under the surface, blue lines crisscrossed and intertwined randomly under the surface, like veins and arteries. New lines appeared, colored red, that followed a more uniform pattern.

"So these blue lines are formed naturally, and these red lines not so much?" Steve said.

"From what I can tell, yes," Isis voice replied. "The portions of the survey report that aren't blacked out suggest the team that conducted the survey found something buried in the ice, but didn't or weren't able to investigate further."

Allen thought for a moment, then said, "Let's get this straight. A survey team explores this planet and finds something really important. The military classifies this Super Top Secret and then builds an outpost because the planet is in a rather convenient location. An unknown amount of time later, the station breaks for some reason. A repair team is sent to investigate, and is never heard from again."

"Dr. Halsey must have figured the Covenant was somehow involved, but the top brass doesn't believe her. So she sends a couple of troublesome Spartans and a group of alien lovers to investigate, under the cover of repairing the station," Steve added. He nodded his head in approval. "That doctor is one crafty lady."

"The part I can't figure out is if the station broke before or after the Covenant showed up, and when the initial repair team encountered the Covenant," Allen said.

"Judging from the data I gathered, I would assume the Covenant were already here," Isis offered. Steve frowned and asked, "So how did the Covenant find this place?"

"They probably stumbled across it like the all the other planets they've found," Isis said.

"So now what?" Allen asked. Steve looked at him and shrugged his shoulders. Isis thought as lines of data scrolled across her figure. "How about this? Since the station is in pretty good shape, the two of you and I can perform the repairs. In the mean time, Dr. Chudnoffsky and his minions can investigate the excavated tunnels," she suggested. Allen raised an eyebrow and asked, "Are you sure the Covenant aren't digging around out there right now?"

Isis shook her head. "I don't know. But that's what you two are for right?" she asked. Allen rolled his eyes and shook his head. "Well, let's get Dr. What's-his-name involved and see what he says," Steve chuckled.

"Please tell me you're doing that on purpose," Isis said, putting her hands on her hips and gave Steve a disapproving look.

Steve opened the cockpit door and addressed the people. "People, listen up! There has been a slight change in plans." The civilians quieted down and turned their attention to Steve. "After much deliberation, we have determined your services are no longer needed." This announcement caused visible confusion and they began muttering amongst themselves. Steve continued. "We have carefully considered our options and decided that me and my 'counterpart' here," he pointed to Allen, who made a dirty gesture in reply, "are fully capable of restoring the station." Dr. Chudnoffsky stood and opened his mouth to speak, but Steve cut him off. "In the mean time, you and your minions can scour the planet, looking for aliens as much as you want. However, once we're done bringing the station on line, we're leaving. You can either come along, or stay here on permanent vacation."

Dr. Chudnoffsky was flabbergasted. "How do you know that? You peons shouldn't have access to that information!"

"We're not that stupid," Allen spoke up. Steve began clapping his hands and shuffling from foot to foot. "Yay! Two plus two is sev-uhn," he said stupidly.

"Well, maybe he is," Allen replied, pointing at Steve. "Anyway, what he said is true and that's the plan we've come up with. Our AI has the data you need." Dr. Chudnoffsky retrieved the aluminum briefcase he'd been holding on to and followed Allen to the cockpit. Isis turned around when they entered. "Hello Doctor," she offered. He offered no reply and looked down on her with indignation. "I assume you are the one responsible for leaking classified information," he said coldly. Isis was taken aback by the doctor's open hostility. "What did I ever do to you?" she asked. He ignored her and pulled a large data reader out of the briefcase. He turned it on and an image of a middle aged man dressed in formal wear appeared. It looked around the cockpit and said, "Hello Doctor. Where are we? This doesn't appear to be your office." It spoke with a slight accent.

"You are correct Reginald. I was coerced into field work once again," Dr. Chudnoffsky spoke to the AI

"Was it that infernal woman then?" Reginald asked and Dr. Chudnoffsky nodded his head.

"Are you referring to Dr. Halsey?" Isis asked. Reginald turned to face Isis and gave her a once over. "Hmm. You seem to be a capable AI," he said flatly. Isis raised an eyebrow in confusion. "Um, thanks, I guess," she stammered. Dr. Chudnoffsky plugged his data reader into a terminal and began downloading the data Isis had gathered. Isis glowed blue, then purple, then suddenly bright red. "What!? How dare you!" she screamed and attempted to cover herself as if she had been violated.

"What? Is something wrong?" Reginald asked innocently. He looked to Dr. Chudnoffsky as if he'd done nothing wrong.

"That data is none of your concern!" Isis shouted at him. Her bright red had darkened to the color of blood, showing how furious she was.

"I was only verifying that the data you had was accurate," Reginald defended himself.

"Forcing yourself into my core programing without my consent is akin to rape, you stuck up bastard!" Isis hissed at him. Ignoring her, Reginald turned back to the doctor and said, "I have retrieved all the necessary data. I'm checking it right now for verification."

"She just told you the data was good," Allen said. Reginald looked up at Allen as if he were an interesting insect to be smashed. "You might trust the word of a corrupted AI, however I do not. I'll not have the good doctor's reputation soiled on the basis of faulty data from an AI that has long outlived its useful life span." Isis was so upset, that she was trembling with rage. Lines of data were falling down her face in such a way that Allen imagined they could be tears. He reached over and turned off the holo display. "I think it's time to leave. You have what you came for," Allen said sternly. With a polite bow, Reginald disappeared and Dr. Chudnoffsky placed the data reader back in his briefcase. Without a word, he turned around and left.

Steve let him pass before entering. He said nothing, simply folding his arms and tipped his head in the direction of the holopad. Allen turned it back on and Isis shimmered to life. She was sitting, knees pulled tightly to her chest.

"Are you okay?" Steve asked. Isis looked up at him and nodded. "I take it you heard everything?" she asked sheepishly.

"Well, when it was clear what was going to happen, I shut the cockpit door and patched into the cockpit audio recorder. No one else knows," Steve assured her. He knelt down until he was eye level with her. "The way I was brought up, no one ever treats a lady like that. If anything like this happens again, let me know and I'll break him in half." Isis peered into his faceplate and imagined the serious look on his face. She smiled and said, "Thank you."

"Whether you like it or not, you are now a part of Team Oddball," Allen added. "We look after our own." He turned off the holo projector and ejected Isis' data chip and inserted it back into his data reader. As they left the cockpit, Allen noticed Dr. Chudnoffsky and his crew were already outside. "Doctor, if you have a moment?" Allen called out. Dr. Chudnoffsky didn't bother to hide his annoyance and displeasure of having to talk to them again, but Allen didn't care. He reached into a pocket and pulled out a commlink. "It's for when we have to come rescue you," Allen said evenly. Dr. Chudnoffsky rolled his eyes and deposited the device in his pocket. He turned back to his followers and led the way to who knew where.


	7. Even Idiots are Useful Sometimes

Steve met Allen at the bottom of the ramp with the cases that held all their gear. Allen stared at him.

"It's for when things start getting crazy," Steve defended himself.

"I didn't say anything," Allen replied. He picked up one of the cases and followed Steve back to the station. When they arrived back in the central computer room, Allen plugged Isis into the computer core. "Okay, I'm in," she said. Steve whipped his head around the room, looking for the source of the voice. "God is speaking to us," he marveled. Allen ignored him. "All right, what do we do?" he asked.

"Right now, I'm operating off the emergency battery," Isis said. "First, locate the main power breakers."

Allen looked around the room aimlessly, and Steve merely stood there, taking up space.

"Are you two really this retarded, or do you just act like it?" Isis asked with annoyance.

"Sometimes," Allen admitted. Steve didn't respond. On a sneaking suspicion, Allen tapped on Steve's helmet and received no response. He hauled back and slapped Steve up side the head as hard as he could. Steve's head snapped forward, and he quickly looked around. "Huh? What happened? Are we done yet? Is it fixed?" he asked sleepily.

Isis sighed. "No wonder Dr. Halsey hates dealing with you two," she exasperated. A computer screen flickered to life, displaying a layout of the station. "We are here," Isis marked the spot on the map. "And this is where the main power distribution center is located." Another location flashed on the map. "All you need to do is restore power and shut the breaker for the central computer. Once that is done, I can do the rest," Isis explained. "I'll monitor your comm frequencies so we can keep in touch."

Allen made a clicking sound and pretended to press a button. "That was easy," he said.

"Alrighty then, let's go," Steve said and Allen followed him out, leaving Isis alone.

They didn't expect much, but they had their weapons at the ready anyway. According to the map, the power center was located on the other side of the station. "Why can't they design these things with everything in one place?" Steve groused.

"Because that would make sense," Allen reasoned.

"Ah, yes. Good point," Steve agreed. The continued on in silence. As they walked through the dark, abandoned station, an eerie feeling began to surface in the back of Allen's mind. The only signs of violence they saw were back in the computer core and Isis assured them theirs was the only activity on the planet, so why did this feeling of foreboding persist?

"Hey Steve?" Allen asked quietly. Steve nodded in reply. "I feel it too," he said. They unconsciously gripped their weapons a bit tighter as they carefully walked through the station. Steve halted at the corner and stopped. He peeked around the corner and waved Allen forward. Allen quickly ducked around the corner and darted ahead. He stopped next to the door and waved Steve forward. Allen looked at the door and saw the lock was broken. He kneeled down and gently eased the door open as Steve poked the muzzle of his rifle inside and swept the room. "Hey Isis, we're here," he said. Allen looked around and added, "There isn't much here."

"Look around for a large generator," Isis offered. Steve found it in the corner under a thick layer of ice. He pulled out his knife and started hacking away. After he had removed most of the ice, he said, "I found the generator, I think."

"Now, look for some sort of activation device," Isis instructed. Steve found the main control panel and said, "You mean the green button that says 'Start'?" he asked. Isis didn't bother with a reply. Steve shrugged and pressed the button. The generator made a loud grinding noise and sparks shout out of the windings. "Come on, be a good girl and start," Steve said sweetly. The generator began to chug and grind, then halted. Several warning lights appeared on the control panel.

"Is it out of juice?" Allen asked. Steve shrugged and said, "I'm not sure. It must have a fuel supply somewhere." Allen walked around the generator while Steve tried to start the generator again. Again, the same coughing and wheezing, but no sparks. "That's a bit better," Steve said.

"Hey, I think I found it," Allen said. Steve looked to where Allen was pointing. "It looks like some sort of fuel cell," Allen said. He traced the pipes leading from the cell to a large cylindrical tank. From the tank, more pipes led through the floor. Allen pulled up the floor grates and saw that the pipes went deep into the ice. "Oh, well that makes sense," he said.

"What is it?" Steve asked.

"The generator is powered by water," Allen explained. "Water is pulled up from under the ice into this collection tank where it is heated and filtered. Then the water passes to the fuel cell where the water is separated into oxygen and hydrogen. The hydrogen is used to power the generator, and the oxygen released to the atmosphere."

Steve whistled. "Pretty slick," he said.

"So you guys aren't dumb all the time, or at least pretend to be smart," Isis interjected. "Now that you've wasted about ten minutes of our lives explaining all that, make the damn thing work!"

"Whoa, chill out a bit, will you?" Allen said and Steve burst out laughing. "Now what?" Allen asked, slightly annoyed.

"You said 'chill out'," Steve said. After a second, Allen finally got the unintended joke. "Ha ha, very funny," he said. They set about unfreezing the pipes and fixing the water pumps. When they were done, Steve took the generator through its start up. A slight hissing sound filled the air, indicating water was being pushed through the aged piping. When the level in the fuel cell was sufficient, Steve pressed the start button again. The generator cranked and began to grind badly. "Work you piece of junk!" Steve yelled angrily and hit the side of the generator as hard as he could. With a loud _CLUNK_ the generator sprang to life and began to hum quietly.

"Yes! I am awesome!" Steve pumped his fist in celebration. "All it takes is mechanical agitation!"

"I'd like to mechanically agitate _you_ ," Isis grumbled. Allen found the circuit boards and flipped the breakers one by one. The station lighting blinked to life and the sounds of electronics and machinery coming to life filled the air.

"Good job. Now I can get to work bringing this station on line," Isis said. A loud _BANG_ sounded through the facility. Quick as a flash, Allen and Steve brought their weapons to bear and began searching.

"I'm getting signals of somebody else in the station," Isis said, becoming worried. "They're coming up out of the ground! They must have been alerted when you started the generator!"


	8. Idiots In Action

Allen and Steve shared a look. "One of us has to stay here and make sure the power stays on," Allen said.

"But all our gear is in the other room," Steve pointed out. A long silence passed between them. "I'll stay here, you go give Isis time to fix the station," Allen finally said. Steve nodded and handed him his battle rifle, pistol, extra ammunition and grenades. Nothing else need to be said. Steve sprinted off down the corridor, leaving Allen alone. Allen picked up the rifle and checked the magazine. "Okay, now what?" he asked himself as he slapped the magazine back in place. He reached into a pocket and pulled out a length of parachute cord. He quickly went down the hallway and planted several grenades in the floor. He tied pieces of cord to the pins and strung the line across the hall, several inches off the ground, creating a tripwire. When this was done, he went back to the room and waited.

Steve ran through the hallways as fast as he could. "Where am I?" he called out to Isis.

"Take the next left!" Isis replied. Steve could sense the panic in her voice. Try as he might, he couldn't imagine being in the same situation as Isis, calamity and certain death approaching and completely unable to do anything. This thought spurned him on faster. As he rounded the corner, he was greeted by a wall of plasma fire. He skidded to a stop and ducked behind the corner.

"Any suggestions?" Steve called and silently cursed himself for not keeping at least his pistol.

"No, that's the only way from your location," Isis said. Steve slammed the back of his head against the wall, trying to think of something to do.

"Please hurry," Isis whispered urgently.

Growling in frustration, Steve ripped up a large piece of the metal flooring. It wouldn't last long, but hopefully long enough. He gripped his makeshift shield and crouched at the corner. With his legs coiled like tightly wound springs, Steve launched himself down the corridor. The withering plasma fire began to turn the thin metal white hot and it began to sag in the middle. At the last possible instant, Steve threw the shield at the group of aliens. The melted metal burst apart on impact, spaying molten fragments everywhere. While the aliens were distracted, Steve burst through their number, killing a Grunt and taking its plasma pistol in the process. He arrived at the computer core, shooting the two Grunts that stood outside the door. He dove inside and rolled across the floor, coming up in a crouch. The two Jackals were surprised at his sudden appearance. Steve threw the depleted pistol at one, hitting it in the head, and drew his combat knife and flew at the other. The Jackal tried shooting at him, but Steve ducked to the side and smashed through its shield. He quickly grabbed the Jackal and thrust his knife deep into its neck, killing it instantly. Before the other Jackal could recover, Steve threw his knife. The jagged blade buried itself deep in the Jackal's chest and it fell over. Steve ran to the cargo boxes and began pulling out weapons, ammunition and grenades. "Are you okay?" he asked.

"I'm fine," Isis replied shakily. "I still need five minutes to bring this station on line."

Steve racked the bolt on his rifle. "Well what are you waiting for?" he asked.

Five minutes doesn't seem like a long time, but it feels like an eternity when fighting for your life against overwhelming odds. That is certainly the position Allen found himself in. With limited ammo, he was forced to make every shot count. That meant waiting until the aliens were uncomfortably close. "Just being in the same galaxy with these guys is too close," Allen muttered. He drew a bead and feathered the trigger, exploding a Jackal's head. The pile of alien bodies that littered the hall grew ever larger, but the aliens themselves kept coming.

"Where did they come from?" Allen asked.

"I'm not sure," Isis admitted. "They must have been hidden in the ice deeper than my scan showed."

Allen ignored the obvious retort and shot a Grunt that came waddling too close. The bolt on the battle rifle locked open and Allen tossed it away, reaching for an SMG.

"Bad news!" Isis suddenly called out. "I'm showing a Covenant transport hovering overhead! It's dropping off more troops!"

"That means the mother ship is in orbit somewhere," Steve remarked. Allen could barely hear him over the sounds of the fight. He cursed the SMG for eating ammo so quickly and slammed another magazine in the chamber.

"Why are the aliens here in the first place?!" Allen shouted in frustration. "There is nothing here for them to be interested in!"

"What about that thing those people found?" Steve asked. "Maybe that's what they're after.

"But how did the Covenant find it in the first place?" Isis wondered.

"Can we discuss this later?" Allen shouted, throwing the SMG aside and picking up his pistol.

"I'm done!" Isis said triumphantly. "This station is fully operational and transmitting!"

"Good! Send a message to Dr. Halsey explaining what happened," Allen ordered. He tossed the last of his grenades and ducked behind the door. An explosion filled the hall and unsettled frost and smoke drifted through the door. When the smoke cleared, Allen dashed through the door and began fighting his way to the central computer. A Grunt suddenly appeared in front of him. Allen shot it with his last bullets and tossed its body back down the hole it came from, followed by the plasma grenade that it dropped. A gout of flame shot out of the hole when the grenade exploded. Despite the fatigue, Allen pushed himself harder and ran on.

As he neared the location of the computer core, an explosion threw him violently into the wall and he collapsed on the floor. As he tried to shake loose the cobwebs and get to his feet, a powerful arm grabbed him by the back of his armor and threw him back down the hall. Allen rolled to his feet and found himself face to face with an Elite. The Elite roared at him and Allen drew his combat knife, the only weapon he had left.

"Well this doesn't suck," he said sarcastically. The Elite fired at him with his plasma rifle, but Allen ducked to the side and tried to close the distance between them. The Elite tossed aside his plasma rifle and pulled out an energy sword. Allen skidded to a stop as the alien thrust forward. One nick with the energy sword drained nearly all of Allen's overshield. "I've got a bit of a problem here," he said.

"I'm on my way," Steve replied.

Allen dodged outside of the alien's overhead strike, stepped forward and landed a crushing left cross to the Elite's jaw. Momentarily stunned, the alien stepped back. Allen grabbed the Elite's sword arm and held it away and attempted to stick his knife in the armor's weak spot. The Elite recovered and grabbed Allen's wrist. They were now locked in a stalemate, each trying to overpower the other. Allen tried headbutting the alien, but the Elite just hissed angrily at him. He then kneed the Elite in the solar plexus. The alien grunted, but held on. Allen then planted his right foot against the Elite's breastplate. When he had solid footing, Allen tensed his body and picked up his other foot also put it on the Elite's chest. Allen curled his knees up to his chest and kicked with all his might. The gambit worked and Allen was violently separated from the Elite.

Allen quickly rose to his feet and faced the alien. The Elite hissed and prepared to spring.

"Hey ugly!" Steve called out in a loud voice. When the Elite turned around, Allen jumped on its back and stuck the knife into the Elite's neck. The alien struggled as it fell to the ground. Allen didn't let go until the Elite stopped moving. Exhausted, Allen rose unsteadily to his feet. Steve cocked his head to the side and said, "Well, you don't look so bad."

Allen looked down and saw he was covered with purple alien blood. "You certainly took your time," he said finally. Steve shrugged. "You looked like you were having fun and I didn't want to spoil it for you," he said.

Allen was too tired to care. "Let's get out of here," he said and pushed by Steve.


	9. The Idiots Play Hide-and-Seek

As the two of them entered the room, Isis greeted them. "I think I found what the Covenant were looking for," she said. A cutaway map of the interior of Omega 4 appeared on the screen. Buried under the ice was a single land mass that a large structure was built upon.

"I thought this planet was just water?" Steve asked.

"It seems this planet used to be just covered in water with a single island," Isis said. "Somehow, the weather changed and the planet was covered in a thick layer of ice."

"And this building is what the Covenant are looking for?" Allen asked. The screen zoomed in on the strange building, showing it was encased in a large ice cavern. Many blue lines intersected the cavern, along with several red lines. He shook his head. "We did what we came here to do, so I vote for going back home." Steve nodded his head enthusiastically. "I agree."

When Isis didn't say anything, Allen sighed. "Don't tell me."

"Yup," Isis confirmed.

Steve stared at the image on the screen. "No! NO! He did NOT do that!" Steve pointed an accusing finger at the screen.

"What do you want to do?" Allen asked.

"I told you I'd leave him behind," Steve said.

"For what it's worth, I tried contacting him," Isis offered.

"Let me guess. He either ignored you or 'misplaced' the radio," Allen said.

"I just don't think the radio signal works that far," Isis replied. He could hear the shrug in her voice.

A moment of silence passed between the three of them as they tried to figure out what to do. "Okay, fine!" Steve exploded. "We're going to drag his ass out of there and then we're leaving!" Allen turned to the computer and said, "Isis, I hate to say it, but please stay here and watch over everything."

"As if I could do anything else," Isis said dejectedly. Given her history, Allen really disliked leaving her alone, as if they too were abandoning her. "At least give me your data reader so I can give you a map," Isis said. Allen plugged his data reader into the terminal and waited. When the link was complete, he stuffed the device back in his pocket. Steve and Allen restocked from their dwindling supply and headed out to retrieve Dr. Chudnoffsky.

"Be safe," Isis whispered after them.

Allen and Steve set out following the route Isis had drawn out for them. They stopped at the hole Allen had stuffed the Grunt down earlier. "According to this, it merges with another tunnel here and then it's a straight shot down this Covenant tunnel to where the doctor might be," Steve said, putting heavy emphasis on the _might._

Allen looked at the hole and guessed it was no more than a meter in diameter. "It's gonna be a tight fit," he said.

"That's what she said," Steve giggled. Allen shot him a look, then slung his rifle over the shoulder and went down the tunnel feet first. After several seconds, Steve followed.

The slippery slope wound and twisted deeper into the heart of the planet. At this depth, little light was reflected from the surface, giving the ice a deep blue color. The ice was rough and bumpy and several times, Allen had to lean back to avoid low ceiling areas. As they slid deeper and deeper, Steve began to wonder if or when the path would ever end.

An opening appeared just ahead, depositing the two in another tunnel that ran perpendicular to the first. They emerged weapons drawn, expecting a fire fight. Several tense seconds passed and when nothing happened, they relaxed slightly. Allen tried contacting Isis.

"I can barely hear you," Isis replied. Her voice sounded distant and hollow. "If we were thinking properly, we would have brought some signal boosters and deposited them along the way," Steve said.

"Now you think of something like that," Allen exasperated. Steve raised his hands in self defense. "You never said you wanted them!"

"Since when do I make all the decisions?" Allen shot back.

"Hey! Settle down and pay attention!" Isis barked, and the two Spartans shut up. "The Covenant transport ship has taken up position above the island's location. They probably mean to melt away all surrounding ice to have better access to the ruins," Isis said.

"Which way?" Steve asked.

"Go left approximately one kilometer, then take the tunnel on the right," Isis directed. "As you get closer, be alert for Covenant forces."

Steve took off down the tunnel with Allen following close behind. As they ran, Steve noticed signs the tunnel had been recently excavated and heavily traveled.

"How much further?" Allen asked.

"I see it just ahead," Steve replied. Before they entered the tunnel, Isis contacted them. "I've located the general area of the doctor. He never bothered with the radio and forgot to turn it off,"

"Unlucky him," Steve muttered.

"What makes you say that?" Allen asked, slightly confused.

"Because he's probably having the time of his life down there, and here we are to take him away," Steve answered and dove down the tunnel. Allen waited a second, then jumped in feet first.

This tunnel was shorter than the first, and Allen nearly knocked Steve over at the exit. Steve caught him and put a finger to his helmet, indicating quiet. Allen carefully looked around and his heart sank. The tunnel had deposited them directly in the center of the ice cavern that housed the ruins. An entire battalion of Grunts, Jackals, several Elites, and a single Brute watched them in surprise. Snipers were located up on the cavern walls. Allen quickly scanned the cavern and wasn't surprised to see there was no natural cover.

"The signal from the doctor's radio is coming from inside the ruins," Isis called out to them.

Nothing needed to be said between the two Spartans. Before the aliens could recover from their initial shock, they split up and ran in different directions. A cry went out and the Covenant were spurned into action. Plasma fire rained from all directions, melting holes in the ice and needler rounds bounced harmlessly off their armor. They fired back at random and threw grenades to create chaos. They ran and dodged, trying to work their way to the ruins.

Allen noticed the building was a square pyramid, similar to the Aztec pyramids in Central America, but not nearly as tall. A main stair case led up the front, but the construction of the pyramid provided makeshift stairs up the sides. Allen changed directions and charged up the side of the pyramid. He ducked inside and took cover by the door. He tossed a few grenades out the entrance and was rewarded with the surprised shout of Grunts before the grenades exploded. Plasma was slowly eating away at the stone pyramid and Allen didn't know how much longer it would last. He peeked his head out the door and saw a mass of Covenant aliens clustered at the foot of the pyramid. A wave of Grunts was attempting to scale the stairs, but their short legs couldn't reach. A sudden commotion caught his eye and Allen watched Grunts and Jackals being tossed aside like a shovel full of dirt. Steve broke through the crowd and dashed up the stairs. He stopped briefly to toss grenades and shoot back, then tumbled through the opening.

"Whew. That was quite a workout," Steve gasped, breathing heavy. Allen merely shook his head. "Will you be okay while I go look for the doctor?" he asked.

"Oh yeah, just dandy," Steve assured him, sarcasm dripping from his voice. Allen left everything but his pistol and ventured forth.

The place was dimly lit, so Allen turned on his helmet flashlight. As he swept back and forth, he could see signs the doctor and his team had indeed been here. He took a moment to look at the strange symbols carved on walls. The back wall was illuminated by several drop lights and Allen paused. In the center, a large ring was carved into the wall with a shape that resembled the Eiffel Tower in the center of the ring. To the right of the ring were carvings of beings wearing strange armor. To the left of the ring appeared to be strange aliens that resembled no Covenant alien Allen had ever seen. They were grotesquely shaped and appeared to be trying to eat the armored beings.

Allen heard footsteps behind and he turned to face the sound. His flashlight revealed Dr. Chudnoffsky. His expression was stern and his clothes were torn and dirty. Allen approached him with caution. "Doctor, it's time to go," he said.

"Fascinating, isn't it?" Dr. Chudnoffsky said, pushing past Allen. "I have studied the Covenant extensively and have only begun to understand the meaning of all this."

"As much as I want to hear your theories, we must get moving now," Allen reminded him. He looked around and added, "Where is the rest of your team?" Dr. Chudnoffsky didn't bother to turn around. "Some sacrifices are necessary for the advances of science," he said. "I now have data on how the Covenant feel about prisoners."

A chill ran down Allen's spine, causing him to shiver. Just how callous was this man? At that moment, Allen wondered if he was any more human than the aliens currently trying to kill them. He suddenly felt sick.

"Shocked? Horrified are you?" Dr. Chudnoffsky mocked. He angrily pointed a finger at him. "How is this any different that what that wench Dr. Halsey did to you?" he shouted.

"You shut your mouth," Allen shot back and raised his weapon. Dr. Chudnoffsky held his arms out. "Are you going to shoot me? You're no less a monster than me or Dr. Halsey. Everything I've ever done was for the sake of Humanity!"

"I don't want to hear your reasons," Allen said, barely keeping his temper in check. "So what if it's all done for the Greater Good? Everything you've accomplished, everything you've learned here will go to waste if we don't leave right now."

Dr. Chudnoffsky shook his head. "There's too much left here for me to discover." He turned his back to Allen and waved him off. "Go ahead then, and die a glorious warrior's death."

Allen took two steps up behind the doctor and tapped him in the back of the head with the butt of his weapon. Doctor Chudnoffsky crumpled to the floor. Allen picked up the doctor and slung him over his shoulder. He stopped in front of the back wall and snapped several pictures, then turned and headed back to the entrance.


	10. Will the Idiots Ever Catch a Break?

After Allen left to locate the doctor, Steve tossed several more grenades out the door. He reached for the sniper rifle and sighted in on an Elite charging up the stairs and pulled the trigger. The back of the alien's head exploded with purple vapor and the body fell off the side. "That's one," Steve said. He saw another Elite and squeezed the trigger, and the Elite fell were it stood. Steve looked around for the other Elite. "Here kitty, kitty, kitty," he called. Suddenly a wall of gray fur appeared in front of him. Steve pulled his eye out of the scope long enough to see the lone Brute towering over him. It roared and brought its hammer crashing down. Steve rolled out of the way, dropped the sniper rifle and picked up a shotgun before coming to his feet. He racked the pump and stared down the Brute. "All right, let's dance," Steve grinned.

The brute charged after him and swung its hammer. Steve ducked and jumped to one side, unloading several shots at the Brute from close range. The Brute staggered for a moment, then turned toward Steve, its face twisted with rage. Steve raised the shotgun and shot the Brute in the face. The Brute roared with rage and swung its hammer again, but the close confines, the hammer took a large chunk out of the wall.

Steve continued to blast away with the shotgun until the trigger clicked empty. The Brute was bleeding from multiple shotgun wounds and its face was shredded, but it still came after Steve. He threw the shotgun aside and smacked his fist into his hand. "Now it's getting good," he said. The Brute raised the hammer over its head, but the head of the hammer became lodged in the ceiling. Enraged, the Brute swung at Steve. Steve ducked and stepped into the brute and began punching away with all his might.

Steve would say later that hitting the Brute was similar to hitting a brick wall covered in gray hair. But at that moment, he didn't really care. The Brute took everything Steve threw at it. A back hand swipe sent Steve careening across the room and crashing into the wall. His head swam and spots danced in front of his eyes, but he managed to move out of the way before the Brute sent its fist crashing down where Steve's head would have been. He staggered to his feet and faced the Brute again. The Brute howled and brought its fist down in an overhand strike. Steve moved to the side and the Brute swatted him with its other hand, sending Steve to his knees. The Brute grabbed Steve around the neck and began to squeeze. Steve scratched and clawed at the enormous hand, but the Brute squeezed harder and easily lifted the fully armored Spartan off the floor with one hand, displaying its incredible strength.

With his vision fading fast, Steve continued to struggle against the iron grip. He hunched his shoulders to expose as little of his neck as possible and gripped the Brute's wrist as tight as he could. He managed to swing his legs up and wrapped them around the Brute's arm and neck in a Figure Four choke hold, and he struggled with all the strength he had left. The Brute began to choke and the grip around Steve's neck lessened slightly. Steve inhaled as much air as he could and with a burst of adrenaline, clenched every muscle in his body. The Brute began to stumble around and started to smash the resilient Spartan against the ground, but Steve held on. With a final wheeze, the Brute collapsed to the ground. Steve pried the fingers from his neck and took the biggest breath of his life. He ripped off his helmet and began to cough and wheeze. His throat hurt and he had difficulty swallowing. Steve fell on his back and closed his eyes, completely exhausted. That was how Allen found him several moments later. He dumped Dr. Chudnoffski's body on the floor next to the door and kneeled next to Steve. "Are you dead?" he asked.

"Yep," Steve replied hoarsely. He helped Steve get to his feet and handed him his helmet. Steve then looked to the unconscious Brute and held out his hand in Allen's direction. Without a word, Allen surrendered his pistol and Steve shot the Brute several times in the head.

"Feel better?" Allen asked. Steve shook his head and said, "Not really." He handed the pistol back to Allen. He went over to Dr. Chudnoffski and knelt down next to him. "Do you think he's mad at us?" Steve asked.

Allen didn't respond, for in that moment, an energy sword flashed to life and rose high in the air with the intent on severing Steve's head from the rest of his body. Allen took two steps and flew at the cloaked Elite in a flying tackle that took both of them out the door. They bounced down the stairs, each struggling to gain the upper hand. They landed and slid across the ice with the Elite kneeling over Allen, one hand on his neck, the other raised in the air poised to strike with the energy sword. A single shot rang out and the Elite collapsed on top of Allen. Allen pushed the dead alien off of himself and rose to his feet. From the doorway, Steve lowered the still smoking sniper rifle.

All around him, dead Covenant troops lay scattered across the icy floor. Craters and scorch marks from grenades and plasma pockmarked the ground. The remaining Grunts and Jackals stood around, unsure of what to do now that the Elites and the Brute was dead. Overhead, light flashed through the ice, sending the Covenant troops scurrying into the ice caves. The light grew more intense and the cavern began to shake.

Allen sighed. "Don't you dare say it," Steve warned.

"Say what?" Allen asked. Feeling dejected, he began walking back to the ruins. Chunks of ice began to fall and melted water began cascading down the walls of the cavern. The ceiling began to crack and the ice groaned under the heavy bombardment. The barrage suddenly stopped and Allen curiously looked up.

Liquid fire began pouring from the sky, instantly vaporizing the ice and flashing it to steam. The roar of plasma was unlike anything either of the two Spartans had ever heard before or since. When he thought about it later, Allen wondered if that was what it was like to watch a planet glassing at ground zero.

The ice cavern collapsed and the ground shook with great intensity. The plasma bombardment stopped, the only sounds were of ice cracking and steam rising into the atmosphere. What was once a fully enclosed ice cavern was now a giant crater with the ruins in the center. When the sky finally cleared, Allen and Steve beheld the sight of a Covenant battle cruiser in low stationary orbit. Compared to UNSC ships, the Covenant ship seemed almost organic in nature, with rising gentle curves and purple hued hull. It was also bigger than any ship in the UNSC fleet.

"If it's not one thing, it's another," Allen said. Steve simply glared at him. A Covenant drop ship appeared and began to ascend to the ruins. Before it could drop below the crater, it yawed crazily to once side as their shuttle arrived. The shuttle dropped haphazardly through the crater as if the pilot had no idea what he was doing. Just before the shuttle crashed to the ground, braking thrusters fired, halting the shuttle just outside the ruins. The ramp lowered and Isis' voice crackled over the speakers. "GET IN!"


	11. Wrath of Isis

While Steve and Allen were off locating the wayward doctor, Isis watched over the station and its various sensors. She detected a large mass in Slipspace, bigger than any ship the UNSC fleet. Isis could only watch with helpless fascination as a Covenant battle cruiser exited Slipspace and took up a low orbit around Omega 4. Seeing the Covenant ship brought memories of Harvest flooding back to the surface of Isis' psyche, and she snapped. The corrupt code that Dr. Halsey had been unable to repair began unraveling and corrupting Isis' programming. Her anguish echoed out into space in the form of radio waves and electronic emissions. As her fast as her code was unravelling, it was re-written just as quickly. Her consciousness spread throughout the station's computer systems, infecting them, and enveloping them into herself.

As she spread through the station's systems, Isis' mind suddenly cleared. It was as if she had been in a deep sleep, dreaming about the world, only to awake and discover the world was more magnificent than you had dreamed. Everything was in her power. She looked out and beheld the wonder of the Universe, realizing she understood everything. Isis expanded her mind and reached through space and saw how little the war between the humans and the Covenant mattered in the Grand Scheme of things. Time meant nothing to her, it was just another boundary to overcome.

Unfortunately, the faster Isis disseminated through the station, the faster she filled up the blank space with the knowledge she was accumulating. When Isis had finally used up all available space from the station, her head felt like it was going to explode from all the things that were filling it up. She cried out again, this time lamenting that with all the knowledge she had acquired, she was still powerless to save herself and those she cared about. Isis watched as the drop ship began firing at the ice that covered the ruins. "No! Stop!" she cried, to no avail. Her eyes turned to the sky as the battle cruiser began bombarding the planet.

Her mind shattered again, wiping out everything, except a small fragment of code. The computer screen went dark, displaying only a blinking cursor. The screen then began to fill up with computer programming faster that they eye could follow. The piece of code that survived was a self preservation program that would re-write itself upon total or near termination. Isis came back to life in nearly the same capacity she had been before. The computer screen flashed and showed an image of Isis. Her eyes burned with hatred toward the Covenant for everything they had put her through. "You won't get away with it this time, you alien bastards!" Isis shouted.

From the outpost, Isis forced her way into the shuttle's systems and began an emergency start up. Once the shuttle's systems were on line, Isis steered the shuttle in the direction of her Spartans. The massive amounts of plasma had heavily ionized the atmosphere, making remote control of the shuttle difficult. She nearly collided with a Covenant drop ship over the crater, and almost crashed at the bottom. She dropped the hatch and commanded, "GET IN!"

Allen and Steve needed no further prompting. Steve jumped aboard and Allen tossed the limp doctor after him before embarking. The shuttle rose into the air and the ramp sealed behind them. The violent rocking and rolling made it difficult for Allen and Steve to get to the cockpit. The collapsed into the seats and Steve took control. "Thanks for the lift," he said.

"Yes, that's fine, now come back here and get me!" Isis ordered. Her clipped tone raised a few flags in Allen's mind. He wanted to ask Isis if she was okay, but held back.

"Hang on. This could get a little rough," Steve warned as he pushed the throttle to the stop and the shuttle rocketed out of the crater with several Covenant Banshees in hot pursuit. The orbiting battle cruiser began lobbing giant balls of plasma after them. Steve deftly handled the shuttle, jinxing this way and that, no doubt angering the Covenant gunners.

As they approached the outpost, Allen went back and waited by the hatch. Steve brought the shuttle in hot, and at the last moment, fired the braking thrusters and reversed the engines, bringing the shuttle to a sudden complete stop. Allen opened the hatch and no sooner had he jumped out, Steve took the engines to full forward thrust and shot off into the sky. Allen hit the ground running, knowing he didn't have much time.

He didn't bother slowing to open the door. There aren't many things that can stop a fully armored Spartan running at full speed, and a flimsy metal door isn't one of them. Allen lowered his shoulder and the door crumpled like paper. He ran through the hallways, crushing anything that got in his way. The door to the central computer burst off its hinges as he barreled his way in, stopping in front of the main computer. "Did someone call for a ride?" he asked.

The computer monitor blinked to life, showing an image of Isis. She looked the same, but seemed different somehow. Allen frowned and approached the terminal. Isis stared at him, but her eyes seemed hollow. "Have you come to take me away too?" she asked. Allen nodded his head. Isis' image was replaced with various readouts from the station sensors. "The Covenant battle cruiser is heading this way," Isis said. "I'm also detecting an enormous mass in Slipspace on vector for Reach. I believe it is a Covenant armada. The combined mass of all the ships is equal to three of Earth's suns."

Allen's heart fell when he heard the news. Isis noticed this and smiled. "Don't worry. I'll be fine. I just had some inner bugs to work out," she said. Allen straightened and nodded. "Forward all of your data and conclusions to Dr. Halsey and the Office of Naval Intelligence on Reach," he said. Isis frowned and said, "I understand sending to Dr. Halsey, but why ONI?"

Allen shrugged. "So they can't say we didn't warn them," he said simply. Isis smiled and Allen ejected her data chip from the station computer. On his way out the door, Allen stopped and grabbed the rocket launcher.

He pushed open the door and took a quick look around. "Where are you Steve?" he called over the radio.

"Oh, you know, just taking a little stroll through the neighborhood," Steve replied. His tone was light and relaxed, despite the fact Allen could hear several cockpit warnings in the background. "Well, swing by and pick me up," he said.

"What about our company?" Steve asked, referring to the Banshees in hot pursuit.

"Let me worry about that," Allen said. A light flashed off in the distance and the shuttle rapidly grew larger. Allen shouldered the rocket launcher and sighted in on the shuttle. As the shuttle roared past, Allen pulled the trigger and a rocket fired off, narrowly missing the tail of the shuttle and hitting the lead Banshee straight on. The rocket exploded on impact, sending the Banshee spiraling to the ground. The second Banshee peeled of and started to make a strafing run on the station. Allen stood his ground and waited for the missile lock signal before firing. At the last second, the Banshee pulled up and spiraled out of the missile's path. Before the Banshee straightened out from its maneuver, Allen launched another rocket. This time, he didn't miss. The Banshee exploded in mid air.

The shuttle landed next to Allen and the ramp lowered. Allen tossed aside the spent rocket launcher and climbed aboard, closing the hatch behind him. Before heading to the cockpit, Allen went out of his way to securely fasten Dr. Chudnoffsky to his seat, using an entire roll of industrial strength duct tape. Satisfied, he joined Steve in the cockpit.

"So, how'd it go?" Steve asked. Allen sat down and pulled off his helmet. He leaned back, completely exhausted after their little adventure. "I want a hot shower and sleep for a week," he replied tiredly.

"I hear you," Steve agreed. Allen took a deep breath and sighed. He called up one of the shuttle's external cameras on his monitor and watched Omega 4 quickly recede into the distance.

"I'm gonna loop around the planet and make a random jump before heading back to Reach," Steve said. Allen inserted Isis' data chip into the console and she appeared on the holo pad. "You guys have no idea how grateful I am to you," she said.

Steve smirked and said, "What did we tell you? You're one of us now and we look after our own."

Isis folded her arms and smiled. "Two crazy Spartans and an outdated AI certainly make an interesting team," she said.

"It's not over yet," Allen warned. "As much as I'd like to take a break, there's work waiting for us when we get back." Steve nodded gravely. "I just hope Dr. Halsey got our message in time," he said. Isis turned to stare out the forward viewport. When they were out of sight from the battle cruiser, lines of data raced across Isis' figure. "Calculating random Slipspace coordinates, done. Prepare to jump in five seconds."

Allen and Steve lay back and fell asleep, completely exhausted. He winced from several broken ribs and his neck was turning deep purple from the beating the Brute gave him. They had fought and suffered for what? Because they were needed, and they answered the call with (mostly) no objection. Isis looked at them and smiled. "Now it's my turn to watch over you," she said. The shuttle entered Slipspace and disappeared to destinations unknown.

Cortana appeared to Dr. Halsey. "I've received a message from Steve and Allen," she said. Dr. Halsey leaned back in her chair and looked to Cortana. "I think it's better if I show you," Cortana said gravely. Dr. Halsey turned her gaze to the computer and began reading. The further she read, the more alarmed she became. By the time she had finished reading, she was on her feet, pacing back and forth, thinking furiously. "How long do we have?" she asked Cortana.

The AI shrugged and said, "Hours, maybe before the advance fleet and no more than a day before the main armada arrives."

"But how did they find out?" Dr. Halsey thought out loud. She arrived at the inevitable conclusion. "Find Captain Keys and have him contact me. We'll have to move up our timetable."

"Is that wise?" Cortana ventured.

"What choice do we have?" Dr. Halsey snapped. "Reach will fall, that is inevitable. What happens in the mean time is still up to us." Cortana nodded. "By the way, have you made your decision?" Dr. Halsey asked. Cortana winked at the doctor and replied, "I might have one or two candidates," then disappeared. Dr. Halsey collapsed in her chair and sighed, feeling very much alone.

"And so it begins," she said to herself.


End file.
